Exxxxxxxxtreme Limits

So I am running in my second consecutive The Relay in a week and while running and other extreme sports don't have a ball, I'm making an exception for many of the following extreme events. Don't worry, the second half talks about balls again, so you'll get your fill dear reader.

For those that don't know, The Relay is a 12 person running relay that starts in Calistoga, California about 25 miles north of Napa, and runs south for 194 miles to Davenport, California. Each person takes turns running a leg varying from around 4 miles (there are few that are shorter) up to 8 miles at the longest. Each person runs 3 legs and the total mileage any one member runs varies from 12.6 to 18.5 miles. Of course the mileage doesn't quite reach marathon levels and I wouldn't call this an extreme event, it is definitely one of the toughest athletic events I've done, likely because I'm never properly trained going into it. But it is distinct from a marathon.

In a marathon, the amateur gets up in the morning after enough sleep, warms up adequately, and runs for 4 hours at a steady pace and is done. Definitely not easy (and something I may never try), but definitely different from The Relay. In The Relay you cram 6 people, and all their supplies into an 11 person van. Maybe you run right away or like this year you ride in a van for 4 hours before actually getting to run. Usually you get about 10 minutes maximum to stretch out and warmup. Then you hit the road at a pace much faster than if you were running a marathon because your leg is only 4.4 miles. It's 2:30pm in May, not the wonderfully cool 8 a.m. start you would normally get in a race. So you burn through your 4.4 miler in about 35 minutes. You are hot and sweaty, your legs feel a little tired, and you immediately hop back in the van to cheer on your other 5 runners in your van. Because you are in the second group of legs (7-12) your only chance to shower and sleep comes at 9pm with a deadline of midnight as you have to be back in place to run Leg 2. So with a couple hours of sleep and in the blistering wind at the south end of the Golden Gate Bridge you take off on a 7.0 mile leg at about 1 a.m, again running a pace much faster than a marathon because it's only really just another 10k plus a few extra laps around a track. You finish in about hour, sweating more than anyone should sweat on the San Francisco shoreline at 2am. Your legs are wobbly as you get in the van to cheer on your teammates until dawn. Once your van finishes its second set of legs you are sufficiently far enough away from any shower or soft bed that your only sleep recourse is in the crowded van in the morning. You only have the opportunity for a few winks (if any) as 10:30am rolls around and you have to somehow muster the energy to tackle 6.2 miles with no sleep since your 7 miler 9 hours ago, with 20 hours of van travel, and 11.4 miles of race pace already done. Your legs are shot. You've eaten an unhealthy amount of energy supplements. You want to shut your eyes and sleep for 12 hours. The sun is starting to shine bright as another May mid morning heats up in the Santa Cruz Mountains. You take the baton and run for the last time a full 10k as your legs feel like they are slogging through nearly set concrete. Everyone cheers you on but you hear nothing but the voice in your head telling you to quit with every struggling step. You make it to the end of your leg. In 21.5 hours you have covered 17.6 miles in more grueling conditions than any marathon, at a pace faster than you would run any marathon. 4 hours later your team finishes the 194 miles and you can barely muster up a light jog as you join the rest of your team in the customary team finish. You won't be able to run even a mile for the next 2-3 weeks without being excruciatingly sore.

Sounds terrible, no? Well what I just described is a preview of my part in The Relay this year and I wouldn't even think a split second about abandoning the challenge despite knowing how difficult it will be. It is a unique experience and when you finish there is such a great sense of accomplishment you want to go back out and doing it again next month. This sense of accomplishment and adrenaline rush you get from doing something so extreme and out of the ordinary is the driving force behind why people do the crazy shit they do in the name of athletics and personal accomplishment. In celebration of The Relay, let's survey some other extreme sports.

Let's stick with running. There is a race that is actually called the Badwater Ultramarathon. Already sounds terrible. It starts in Death Valley and goes to over 8000 feet up Mt. Whitney. The route is 135 miles. It starts July 16! Can you imagine running even 5 miles in Death Valley in mid-July? This is insane. You have a 48 hour time limit which means you still have to cover the distance at 21mins/mile or just a shade under 3 miles per hour. That wouldnt be easy do to if you just walked the course. Add in over 14000 feet of elevation gain and 130 degree temps and it's amazing anyone finishes at all. Did I mention if you run on the asphalt for too long your shoes melt in Death Valley (Notice the picture above, the runner is staying on the painted white line)? Well people do finish. One 60 year old man, Marshall Ulrich, has finished a record 16 times. Another man, even older at 69, has finished 13 times. Both finished last year. The winner last year did it in 23 hours and 41 minutes. 10 and half mins per mile. That's faster than a whole bunch of serious amateur runners would run 6 miles.  Unbelievable. Those men and women get my badass seal of approval.

How does underwater hockey strike you? This bizarre sport started in Great Britain in the 50's for divers during winter months when the weather was too cold outside for diving. Basically you strap on a snorkel and mask carry a little stick and try to maneuver a puck  on the bottom of a pool into the goal. I think of this as water polo without the ability to breathe. Water polo is extraordinarily difficult due to the amount of physical assertion you have to do above water. Imagine trying to do the same thing underwater without breathing. I think I would last maybe 10 total minutes in a game like that before I became so out of breath i was useless. Way to go swimmers and divers!

That not doing it for you? How about something called limbo skating? Apparently all the rage now in India, your goal is to skate underneath cars. Yes thats right. Skate undeneath a tiny ass car. Requiring an insane amount of balance, flexibility and strength it is no wonder that the world record was set by a 6 year old boy that practices 4 hours a day. At his lowest he is on skates a mere 8 inches off the ground. Just the ability to do that is extreme but with injuries occurring due to the slightest error this is one extreme sport.

And of course besides these you have your "run of the mill" standbys: skydiving, base jumping, cliff diving, free-running (parkour), bmx freestyle, river rafting, and of course the combo 7 Summit climb and ski. Davo Karnicar of Slovenia was the first man ever to climb the 7 Summits (highest point in each continent) and then ski all the way back down. I can't imagine the physical requirements of climbing Mt. Everest and then skiing down it but that guy is one extreme badass.

Obviously you aren't right in the head if you undertake a lot of these extreme sports, but the spirit of them transcends sports. It's about personal growth and an unbridled sense of achievement. In some ways it's no different than Dirk Nowitzki chasing his first NBA championship or Emmitt Smith breaking the career rushing yardage record. Those are extraordinary sense of accomplishments. But in another sense the traditional sports don't come close to what extreme sports try to accomplish. The growth of the human race and an expansion in the known physical limits of the human body are accomplished every day someone engages in these brutal physical trials. The Relay is my idea of extreme, but my hat goes off to each and every one of these extreme sports participants, they accomplish things ordinary humans don't.

 If that wasn't extreme enough to get you going, then I offer you a preview of the first round of the NBA playoffs which start this weekend. Before I get started, a couple of notes. I was asked by a number of people my opinion on the Ron Artest suspension. That makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside that people take my opinion seriously enough to ask. For the record, I think the punishment was appropriate. That elbow was nothing but malicious, and to be honest I don't think there is too much outcry that the punishment was too harsh. Given Artest's track record, I'm surprise he didn't get banned longer. I think had he broken Harden's jaw and removed Harden from the playoffs Artest would be gone too. I'll get to the impact his first round playoff suspension (minus game 7) will have later.

The other thing I want to note is that you need to throw the regular season out the window. It was a bizarre regular season, the final standings this year more than any other year is a poor reflection on the overall talent of the teams. Besides, the playoffs are a completely different beast, so don't be shocked by a number of upsets in the first round. Let's start in on the West.

(1) San Antonio v. (8) Utah

Utah is amazing. A team that continued to be written off all year, made the final push and stole the 8th seed away from Phoenix and Houston. Not that this should be a surprise, Utah has decent talent and it is finally coalescing together in this last month. Meanwhile, I can't believe San Antonio ended up being the #1. I don't even think they are that good. They lost to a big Memphis team last year as the #1 and I can see them losing to this big Utah team as well. Jefferson and Millsap are as capable as Randolph and Gasol were last year. If Harris continues his stellar play to counterbalance Parker I don't even think this is close. In April they split a home and home, with the home team winning each one. That doesn't bode well for Utah, they'd have to win this in 6 to win it at all. And thats what I am picking: Utah in 6.

(2) Oklahoma City v. (7) Dallas

Not sure anyone thought last year's WCF matchup would be rematched in the 1st round this year but that is how inconsistent Dallas has been this year. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe there is a single team in the West that I look at as definitely beating Dallas. That includes everyone's Western darlings the Thunder. OKC has been terrible in April, only beating one playoff bound team and losing to 7 others. Granted OKC has a 3-1 edge in the regular season on Dallas, but two of the losses were 50/50 games (including the Durant buzzer beater in December). Oklahoma City has talent, youth, and athleticism, but as this April showed they may not have the playoff chops yet. Losing the #1 seed to San Antonio was the definitive proof of that. Dallas on the other hand needs BIG defensive contributions from Brendan Wright, Ian Mahinmi, and Brendan Haywood to win this series. Letting Chandler go probably left a repeat for Dallas on the table, but, this team has been very strong defensively without him. If Dallas can get the offense going with their guards to take pressure off Dirk (who can't be covered by anyone in an OKC uniform) Dallas will win this series. They are the champs until beaten: Dallas in 7.

(3) LA Lakers v. (6) Denver

For my money I think LA is as talented as any team in the West. They aren't deep but a starting five of Session, Kobe, Artest, Gasol, and Bynum is a very good starting five. Maybe the best in the conference. Of course they lose Artest for this series and they aren't very deep behind. But I think Barnes can do his best thug impression of Artest and hold down the fort against Denver. Besides I think the loss of Artest's perimeter D is overblown. As we saw last year, Kobe is capable of shutting down any guard when he wants to. (Ex. A: Chris Paul, round 1). Denver has a lot of good pieces but no real killer. It also doesn't have a lot of significant playoff experience as key components of this team, especially in the front court (Faried, Mozgov, and McGee). I think the Lakers expose them in that area and run away with this one, without Artest. LA Lakers in 5.

(4) Memphis v. (5) L.A. Clippers

This one is a no brainer for me. Everyone loves the high flying show of the Clips, and Paul is one of the best if not best clutch players in the game right now. But they run into a Memphis team that finished the way I expected, with a homecourt advantage in round 1. They are a very solid team up and down. They have good size, and the best defense in the Western Conference. They survived a Randolph injury and they are peaking as much as any team in the West right now. Meanwhile the Clippers have shown a propensity to meltdown on occasion and if they get off to a poor start in the first couple of games they don't strike me as a team that will be resilient. It's cool to see them in the playoffs but this is a one and done year for them. Memphis in 5.

Moving to the East

(1) Chicago v. (8) Philadelphia

This could be the most boring playoff series ever. Both teams give up less than 90 points a game. Once upon a time Philadelphia was sitting pretty at the 3 seed and was looking like a solid young team. Then everything fell apart on offense and they just can't seem to score anymore. They would have to fix that in a hurry to have any chance here. Doubtful. This is a great series for Rose to get back into the swing of things as I don't believe Philly poses any threat to Chicago. Chicago is way too deep and is probably more talented at every single position on the floor. Chicago in 4

(2) Miami v. (7) New York Knicks

Everyone seems to think this is going to be a tough matchup for the Heat because of the way New York is playing. Look this team didnt beat Miami all year, including a recent game where Carmelo scored 42. They don't have homecourt advantage and let's not forget they are playing against certifiable playoff killer in Dwyane Wade. New York may get 1 but expecting more is ludicrous. Miami in 5.

(3) Indiana v. (6) Orlando

I don't think this will be as big of a mismatch as everyone thinks it is. Sure Hibbert will have his way inside and Indiana has a very solid team, but Orlando has the ability to put up points in a hurry and Indy isn't exactly the best defensive team in the East. That being said, you dont simply lose Dwight Howard and then win a playoff series against a better team. Indy can score with the best of them in the East too and I think they will be too much. Maybe they lack real playoff experience but they are better than Orlando. Indiana in 6.

(4) Boston v. (5) Atlanta

This smacks of 7 games all over it. Atlanta actually has the better record, but by virtue of the rule that a division winner has to be at least a top 4 seed, Boston is the listed 4, while Atlanta is the listed 5, but Atlanta still gets homecourt. I think it's amazing and a testament to the team that Atlanta finished with the 4th highest record in the East despite losing Al Horford so early and for the whole season. They got a surprise boost from Kirk Hinrich this year which helped keep them afloat. The problem is they run into a Boston team that has been playing very well of late and knows this is the swan song for this current version of the Celtics.. On paper, Boston is still the more talented team, but not by much. Like I said this is as even of a matchup as we have in the playoffs this round. I don't see Boston losing or Atlanta winning a Game 7 even though it is in Atlanta. Boston in 7.

I think for my money the most fun series to watch besides my favorite Mavericks will be the Grizzlies/Clippers and Celtics/Hawks. I think those will be wildly entertaining.